Monday, December 14, 2009

Proverbs 5:1-2: Reflections on the word "poop"

Today was a milestone in the life of my daughter. My wife called me from home and let me know that when she asked my daughter if she was working on a poop, my daughter coyly smiled up at her and said, "poop."

Now, I'm sure it was just a mimicking of noises, as she has been actively trying to do that lately, and at 6 months I'm impressed she's doing that at all! It's also really cute to hear a 6 month old talk about anything, even poop!

As I was sharing this great joy and laughter with the staff at my church, we were in an uproar about the whole situation. One person, however, commented, "yeah...my 4 year old won't stop talking about poop, won't stop calling people poopies...and in general just loves the word poop."

"My child, be attentive to my wisdom; incline your ear to my understanding, so that you may hold on to prudence, and your lips may guard knowldge." - Proverbs 5:1-2.

To be honest, it was kind of a buzzkill, although I still think it's awesome that my 6 month old can say "poop", but it got me thinking about our kids maturing and growing up. How much of what we don't want our kids to do, do they really learn from us? How many of the words they say, that we wish they wouldn't, slip out of our lips? And the really tough question, is even if they don't hear it, how many words do we say in private that we don't want them to say at all?

I remember growing up and playing sock baseball with my dad, and I don't know why, but I said the word "fart". Now, most dads would be proud of me or not care, but I remember my dad telling me that we don't use that word. So, as a kid who loved his parents, I didn't say it. It became one of those words that wasn't acceptable to say.

Is there harm in the words "fart" or "poop"? No, they are slang words for bodily functions that are natural and help our body maintain health. The reason we don't use them in public is because in Western society it is unacceptable to talk about bodiliy functions...as though not everyone did them.

But what words do we want to teach our kids to stay away from? Is "poop" your worst fear? If you condemn the word "poop" will you have trouble with potty training?

What about the word "kill" or "hate"? I know "hate" is usually one that parents try and stear away from, but it's hard when mom and dad are watching a football game with some friends and casually say, "I just hate the Washington Redskins." Do you really hate them? No. Does your kid really hate the person they say it, mimicing you? No. Does the other person know that. No.

The way the world is now, I still laugh at a 6 month old saying poop and I'm not too concerned if she keeps saying it in public. But I would be worried about my own actions and attitudes if she started using words like "hate", "kill", "steal", "useless".

Perhaps as we are trying to hold onto wisdom in our children's lips, we should rethink the words we let them say. Perhaps we should rethink the video games and movie that are okay and not okay. Did you know that the majority of Americans will let their kids watch a Rambo movie willingly, but will freak out if people are kissing on screen or there is a touch of nudity? I'm not in favor of immature children being exposed to things too early, but there is something wrong when violence is considered more acceptable than appropriate displays of affection.

So maybe scripture should read this, and more for me as I am a new parent:
"Parents, be attentive to God's wisdom; incline your ear to God's understanding, so that you may teach prudence, and your lips may express knowledge."

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